Under a Parasol
by lykHELL
Summary: "Yumi, I love you so much. Stop hurting me. Tell me you love me." She couldn't look at her, she couldn't face her. Not when the expression on Sachiko's face showed her so much longing. "If I loved you, I couldn't leave you like this."


_**Disclaimer: don't own anything, don't sue me**_

* * *

It had been a stormy afternoon. The cold rain pelted Yumi's exhausted body as she faced a very concerned Sei Satou.

"Many times I felt that I loved Sachiko." Yumi cried, wiping her tears away with her hands. Sei looking at her with sad, understanding eyes. Yumi covered her mouth, and cried harder. It seemed like her tears would never end.

It was over between them, Sachiko was gone, having wandered away in shock after Yumi had told her she was cutting ties with her. And here she was standing, getting ready to walk away from Sachiko's life forever. Yumi rubbed at her eyes. The realization of what she had done, how she had hurt the older girl, and the understanding of the finality of the situation caused her to feel almost physical pain.

Sei held her umbrella over Yumi's head and hers, and replied in a soft voice

"Say what you just said again, Yumi-chan."

"W-Why?" Yumi asked stammering and sniffling

"Because you should at least tell the truth to me."

Yumi stared for a moment, and then said in a wavering voice.

"I love her Sei-sama. I love her so much."

"Speak louder." Sei replied, staring intensely.

"Why?" Yumi asked quietly.

"Just do it. If you don't tell the truth to someone out loud, you will feel this pain inside of you forever. You will never let it go. You should listen to me. And I am telling you to say the truth loudly." Sei said.

"I love her." Yumi said a little louder, her tears still trailing down her cheeks. The rain had slowed to a drizzle, and in the quiet that followed, Sei's voice seemed so loud.

"No, that's not how you confess. Speak LOUDER." Yumi winced.

_'Was this really going to help?'_ Yumi wondered. She tried again, unable to resist Sei's strange request.

"I love her." Yumi spoke, trying to be louder.

"That's still not good enough. Knowing you, maybe I am the last person who will get to hear this confession from you. Now say it so that it can be heard."

"Sei-sama, I don't think..." Yumi replied, feeling reluctant.

"DO IT." Sei ordered firmly. "Get it off your chest."

Yumi considered what Sei had said. It would be the last time she would admit her feelings. And after she was finished she would put it behind her and let it go. It might help to say it, if only to momentarily relieve the strange achy feeling in her chest. Yumi nodded, finally convinced. She'd do it if it would take away the emotional and physical pain that she wished would fade.

"I LOVE SACHIKO." Yumi cried loudly.

"Is that all?" Sei asked expectantly.

"No, it isn't. I love how she is stubborn and temperamental, sweet and kind. I love her smile and I love her frowns. I love her." Yumi burst into tears again. "I love her Sei-sama."

"Good girl." Sei patted her on the shoulder. "It's time for me to go now." Before turning to leave, she nodded and then made a strange beckoning motion, staring into the distance at some point behind Yumi.

Yumi barely had a moment to wonder what it meant, when she felt a hand on her arm. The hand pulled her backwards so that she turned and gasped as she came face to face with Sachiko.

Sachiko's hands moved to the collar of Yumi's uniform as the younger girl cried. Brown eyes glanced at Sachiko's face and then looked away.

She didn't want to see the older girl's pained expression.

Yumi cried, looking down at her shoes and at the still water of the puddles on the ground. The rain had stopped.

Sachiko gripped her arms, pulling her closer, her heavy breathing sounding loud in the silence that followed that ceasing of the rain. Yumi bent her head, continuing to avoid her gaze.

Her tears wouldn't stop. She couldn't look at her, she couldn't face her. Not when the expression on Sachiko's face showed her so much longing.

"If I loved you, I couldn't leave you like this." Sachiko said quietly, her hands shaking. Leaning down so that her face was close to hers, she continued

"That's what you said. You said that you never loved me. Say it again."

"I n-never loved you." Yumi echoed, her eyes closing.

She whimpered as Sachiko kissed her cheek, brushed her lips against her closed eyelids, her forehead and finally, her lips.

"Tell me again how you don't love me." Sachiko whispered as she wrapped her arms around Yumi's waist.

"I don't want to. What are you trying to do?" Yumi trembled.

"Say it again." Sachiko ordered.

"I don't love you." Yumi said as she was pulled up against her. "Sachiko. Stop asking me. It hurts. I can't…" she sobbed.

Sachiko kissed Yumi deeply, holding her close.

"You said you don't love me." Sachiko said quietly. "But I am not going to believe you. You aren't leaving. You are going to stay with me. I am going to stay with you."

"No. It's not going to work." Yumi whispered. She unconsciously gripped Sachiko's shoulders, clenching her fists in the damp fabric. "It won't work. I can't stay…"

"I will make it work." Sachiko murmured, kissing her ear. "We will make it work."

"Your Grandfather will ruin my family. He'll hurt them. I can't let him do that. I can't."

"But you'll let him ruin me? And you'll let yourself hurt me?" Sachiko asked plaintively.

"Stop." Yumi wailed as she kissed her face. "Stop it."

"No. I won't stop." Sachiko said, leaning back to look at her. "Yumi, look at me." she ordered.

"No." Yumi replied, closing her eyes, tears still trailing down her cheeks. "I won't look at you. I _can't_ look at you."

"Yumi, you foolish..."

At the sound of her whined insults, Yumi opened her eyes.

"Coward." Sachiko finished, scowling at her now.

Yumi stared back at her. Facing her, facing the hurt she had caused her was pain.

"Sachiko."

"Didn't I tell you I'd choose you? Didn't I tell you I'd protect you?

"You said that. But what about the people I have to protect? What about them?"

"I'll protect them too."

"How?"

"I will find a way. You'll have to trust me."

"Sachiko, I have to leave. Your grandfather said..."

"If you are going to try and be a martyr to protect everyone, then aren't you going to try and protect me too?"

"I…" Yumi gaped at her.

"Or am I not worthy of that kind of sacrifice?" Sachiko asked thoughtfully, looking away from her into the distance. "Because you don't love me?"

"Stop saying that I don't love you." Yumi whimpered, leaning her forehead against her neck. "Stop it."

"No." Sachiko said grimly, looking down at her as Yumi pressed her face against her neck. "Because you don't love me, you'll let _me _suffer. Because you don't love me, you are going to _leave_ _me_. And because you don't love me…" Sachiko stopped mid sentence as Yumi looked up and covered her mouth with her hands.

"Stop it." Yumi said urgently, unable to stand her words anymore. "Stop it." She said again as Sachiko glared at her over the hand that was covering half of her face. Sachiko mumbled something against her fingers and feeling frantic, Yumi shouted at her. "DON'T SAY THAT!"

"STOP!" She yelled, her eyes filling with tears again. "Don't say anymore!" The tears spilled over and down her cheeks.

"Please." Yumi implored her, sobbing uncontrollably.

Blue eyes softened. Slowly, Yumi's arms relaxed, her hands falling away from Sachiko's mouth.

"Yumi." she said quietly, holding her shoulders. "Don't you think you should trust me?"

"No." Yumi replied, starting to realize the truth in her words.

Sachiko caressed her cheek, bending down to kiss her. "I tell you I love you and you say that you don't love me?"

"No." Yumi whispered, closing her eyes and moving to meet her lips.

Sachiko paused, just inches from kissing her "Then say it. Be honest to me."

"Sachiko."

"Yumi, I love you so much. Stop hurting me." Sachiko brushed her lips against hers lightly. "Tell me you love me." she whispered urgently, pressing her forehead to hers.

"Sachiko." Yumi whimpered, wrapping her arms around her neck. Sachiko smiled painfully and nuzzled her with her nose.

"I don't want to leave you." Yumi said, overcome with emotion.

"If you want to protect something…" Sachiko whimpered, pressing her face against her neck as she wrapped her arms around the younger girl's waist. Her voice was slightly muffled, but the meaning of the words she spoke next was loud and clear.

"Then tell me that you love me and _save me."_

Yumi gasped, crying silently and gazing up at the sky. The wind still blew around them. But all the clouds were now gone. Gripping the fabric of her collar and leaning further into her embrace, Yumi considered what Sachiko had said.

She had asked her to protect her. She had asked her to _save her_.

Yumi had never thought that she might be of any importance to her survival. But here they were in each other's arms, Sachiko holding Yumi tightly as though she was deathly afraid of letting her go.

They continued to embrace, their clothes damp and clinging to their bodies. Sachiko shook slightly. Yumi shivered.

The warm, wet feeling she repeatedly felt on the soft skin of her neck was something Yumi had never expected from her. Sachiko's tears soaked into the already damp collar, her fingers clutching the material of her uniform. Sachiko said her name incoherently as she cried, and Yumi realized that she was right about her. She had never thought to protect her; she had never considered how her leaving would affect her. She had only thought of her family and a little of herself.

She had never thought of _her_.

Realizing the selfishness of her actions, Yumi felt deep regret.

It was time for that to end.

"Sachiko." Yumi said, turning her head to kiss her ear. "Sachiko, are you listening to me?"

Sachiko shuddered and replied hoarsely "Yes."

"I'm going to do my best. I'm not going to leave." Yumi whispered, gathering up her nerve.

"That's good." Sachiko said her voice breaking. She kissed the soft skin of her neck. "What else?"

"I-I'm going to trust you." Yumi murmured, running her fingers through black hair.

"I'm glad." Sachiko replied, rubbing her back. "It's about time." she said, sighing. Sachiko pulled away to kiss Yumi's temple, and then pressed her cheek against hers. Yumi sighed too. They held each other, savoring the embrace.

"And Sachiko?" Yumi broke the silence after a while.

"Yes?" she mumbled back, going still.

"I love you." Yumi said, pulling away and looking her in the eye. Blue eyes gazed back at her, and smiled. Yumi brought her fingers to Sachiko's face and wiped away the remnants of her tears. She began sobbing anew when Sachiko's eyes brimmed over with tears again. Reaching for the taller girl, pulling her close, Yumi leaned in to kiss her. Right before their lips met, Sachiko breathed her reply.

"I love you too."


End file.
